Embracing the inevitable

Do you want to talk about your beautiful country, family, or dog? Would you like to say where you went on holiday or how you arranged the garden? Are you willing to tell us you girlfriend left you for a(nother) loser? Do you have ANY non knife-related topic you want to discuss? This is the place!

Moderators: Bonzo, Wally J. Corpse, The Motley Crew

Forum rules
There are a few things you should know before posting in these forums. If you are a new user, please click here and read carefully. Thanks a lot!
Post Reply
User avatar
ILikeStilettos
Posts: 1576
Joined: Tue Jan 28, 2014 3:36 pm
Location: Norman, Oklahoma, USA
Contact:

Embracing the inevitable

Post by ILikeStilettos »

Myron Greenberg, a wealthy L.A. businessman received a letter of audit from the IRS. It really upsets him so he called his accountant, Saul Meyers.

Myron (pleading): "Saul, what are they doing to me? Why are they doing this to me?"

Saul (calming): "Myron, don't worry about it. I've got all the receipts, the account is up to date, it's no problem. But let me give you a bit of advice. When you go to the Audit, make a bad impression. Wear the crummiest, dirtiest clothes you've got. Have holes in your shoes, ripped pants and look shabby. I mean really look terrible, because if they have a little sympathy, they'll go easy on you".

Then Myron called his lawyer, Aaron Steinberg.

The lawyer said: "Myron, it's no problem, I'm sure they got the receipts, I'm sure everything is up to date, you've got a great accountant, don't worry about it. Let me give you a tip. When you go to the audit, it's very important that you make a good impression. Wear your best suit, and your shirt with a silk tie and cuff links and shine your shoes, look like somebody. Because if you look like a somebody they respect you and will go easy on you".

Now he's torn.

That night he bumped into his rabbi at the deli and he told the Rabbi Schustermann the story.

Rabbi: "Myron, it reminds me of sometimes when I perform a wedding. The bride's father will tell his daughter that on her wedding night to wear a nightgown with a high collar and long sleeves and a full-length robe ... cover up, you know, be a little demure. But the mother says, "Don't be silly. Wear a low cut negligee with the cleavage sticking out - look a little sexy..."

And, Myron, I will say to you just like I say to the bride on her wedding night, "It makes no difference what you wear, you're gonna get f**ked".
Dave Sause
oldandfat@cox.net
(405) 694-3690

"And you're telling me this because, somehow, I look like I give a shit?"

"Let a smile be your umbrella and you're gonna get your dumb ass wet."
sammy the blade
Posts: 4023
Joined: Sat Mar 26, 2016 7:18 pm
Location: Indiana

Re: Embracing the inevitable

Post by sammy the blade »

How true!
2024 candidate for president
User avatar
john
Posts: 4524
Joined: Tue Dec 01, 2009 11:40 am
Location: New England, MA USA

Re: Embracing the inevitable

Post by john »

Very good!
Your friend on the web's most friendly community on knives and blades,
John

Massachusetts Where Everything is Illegal or Taxed
Post Reply