Attention: Mr. Landsurveyor, Your Ship Has Come In!

Bonzo · Post by **Bonzo** » Sun Feb 23, 2003 12:07 am

Here it is! I've had this old Rizzuto for over 30 years, and it could be yours, for the low price of: $59,999.99

Shipping & handling extra. What a deal!

Best Regard's,

Bonz

PS- You'll have to have some guards and scales made for it. They dissapeared long ago.

Landsurveyor · Post by **Landsurveyor** » Sat Mar 01, 2003 8:55 pm

Is that a bannana in that picture or are you just happy to see me? Well okay, I'll buy it but it will have to be on the same terms as the last seller. One penny a day, every day untill the debt is paid in full. The knife must be shipped to me within 2 days of the final payment. Thank you for your understanding.

Bonzo · Post by **Bonzo** » Sun Mar 02, 2003 12:21 am

Mr. LS,

Is that anything like the 1 million dollar French lottery? A dollar a year for a million years. Tickets are 1 for a dime, 2 for a quarter and 3 for half a buck. The banana effect is from the missing guards, and the rust on the mechanism is only superficial. I accept paypal, diners club, chevron, and Mabel's House of Whore's gift certificates.

Best Regard's,

Bonz

ray · Post by **ray** » Sun Mar 02, 2003 5:52 am

Hey BONZ,
YOU have climbed to the top of my personal POO-POO list for not offering that beauty to me first!! Have I harshed your mellow, harangued your whang, or crapped in your mess kit? This mass injustice will HAVE to be dealt with in Eugene. And send the dog to me, RIGHT NOW!!

Vagrant · Post by **Vagrant** » Sun Mar 02, 2003 6:22 am

And I've NEVER owned a Rissuto.

Post by **jim d,** » Sun Mar 02, 2003 9:46 pm

Vagrant,

Neither have I

Jim

Vagrant · Post by **Vagrant** » Mon Mar 03, 2003 6:39 am

I've had a deprived life [my Girlfriend always corrects me and says a DEPRAVED life]

J-man · Post by **J-man** » Mon Mar 03, 2003 3:23 pm

It's always good to have a girlfriend to correct your possible depressed thingy causing problems saying thingy (read that about 10-50 times before replying)

Bonzo · Post by **Bonzo** » Mon Mar 03, 2003 5:46 pm

ray wrote:Hey BONZ,
YOU have climbed to the top of my personal POO-POO list for not offering that beauty to me first!! Have I harshed your mellow, harangued your whang, or crapped in your mess kit? This mass injustice will HAVE to be dealt with in Eugene. And send the dog to me, RIGHT NOW!!

Mr. ray,

POO-POO? Ah yes, thats the other way to spell Rizzuto. I have not received any pennies from the Surveyor dude, so I guess it's still up for grabs. You can take me off of your s**t (wow! I self moderated myself!) list now. As for the mutt, he ran off with the coyotes again. I'm sure he'll come crawling back all beat up in a few weeks, as usual.

Best Regard's,

Bonz

J-man · Post by **J-man** » Mon Mar 03, 2003 6:29 pm

Bonz, have you ever considered nudering your dog?
And if that Rissuto is still avaliable I'll take it, as long as I don't have to pay anything

ray · Post by **ray** » Mon Mar 03, 2003 11:47 pm

Hey BONZ,
DAMN!! I snooze for a couple hours and I get blindsided by that lucky Canuckian!! If he doesn't cough up the Loonies and Twoonies then bring that jewel to Eugene.

Bonzo · Post by **Bonzo** » Mon Mar 03, 2003 11:56 pm

J-man wrote:Bonz, have you ever considered nudering your dog?
And if that Rissuto is still avaliable I'll take it, as long as I don't have to pay anything

Mr. Joint-Man,

Herr Shultz is nutered, but for some reason, it made his resolve for hanky panky twice as bad, and then to top it off, he buffed out like bull. The big problem with him is he's so damned smart, but he let's on like he's the dumbest canine in the world. I wish I could pull of some of the stuff he does to women when they visit. Makes me jealous sometimes.

As for the Rizzuto, I'm going to put it on a charity auction on the 'Off Topic' forum. For a very good cause.

Best Regard's,

Bonz