Happy B-Day, JERRBEER!

Post by **Wally J. Corpse** » Sat Aug 17, 2002 3:28 am

Greetings, Mr. Doofus Emeritus-

Laber Day Festival of Fools, you say? Perhaps you'll need an assistant to provide the decay necessary for a proper gun-beer-roofer wiseguy motif, 'eh? I shall begin gnawing at the restraints now.

Happy Birthday, Mr. JerrBear-

For your gift, we gun-beer-roofers chipped in and got you a cancelled postcard stamp from Fresno, and a Safeway coupon for Depends, the roomy re-useable models.

No need to thank us-

AS ever,

Your ol' pal,

Wally J. Corpse

The Falcon · Post by **The Falcon** » Sat Aug 17, 2002 6:50 am

Jerr,

I'd like to celebrate your birthday but I just found out that Elvis is dead. I'll have to get back to you.

The Falcon

JerrBear · Post by **JerrBear** » Sat Aug 17, 2002 8:11 am

Aw, shucks, fellas...Thanks! I'm all choked-up!

Mr. Falcon,

Sounds like a "Flimsy and Transparent Excuse" for you to not buy me a gift!

Doofus Emeritus · Post by **Doofus Emeritus** » Sat Aug 17, 2002 2:39 pm

Mr. The Falcon,

Elvis may be dead, but Pricilla ain't. I'd like to give her Mr. Happy.

Mr. Corpse,

Did you approve of my private meassage?

Best Regard's,

Bonz

Post by **jim d,** » Sat Aug 17, 2002 2:44 pm

Bonz,

Did you mean give it her or just lend it to her?

Jim

ray · Post by **ray** » Sat Aug 17, 2002 3:05 pm

Hey BONZ,
As Leslie Nielsen said to Priscilla in Naked Gun, "What a beaver!" She definitely makes my "Dandy Clam" list.

Doofus Emeritus · Post by **Doofus Emeritus** » Sat Aug 17, 2002 5:55 pm

Mr. Jim D,

The answer is Yes to everything Priscilla.

Mr. ray,

I loved her reply when she said 'I just had it Stuffed'! I'm sure the Dandy Clam is well cropped. Here's a pic for ya to drool over.

Best Regard's,

Bonz

ray · Post by **ray** » Sat Aug 17, 2002 9:02 pm

Hey BONZ,
OOOCHA McGOOCHA!! :-p

The Falcon · Post by **The Falcon** » Sat Aug 17, 2002 9:16 pm

Bonz,

You better keep "Mr. Happy" in your knickers or Mrs. Emeritus may do a Lorena Bobbitt trim job on it.

The Falcon

JerrBear · Post by **JerrBear** » Sat Aug 17, 2002 9:35 pm

Mr. Bonzo,

Methinks "Mr. Happy" would make Ms. Priscilla mos' SAD...

The Falcon · Post by **The Falcon** » Sat Aug 17, 2002 9:39 pm

Jerr,

Are you implying that Bonzo has a teenie weenie?

The Falcon

JerrBear · Post by **JerrBear** » Sat Aug 17, 2002 9:47 pm

Mr. Falcon,

You forgot "itsy bitsy." HO! HO!

Doofus Emeritus · Post by **Doofus Emeritus** » Sat Aug 17, 2002 10:05 pm

Mr. JerrBeer,

I will admit I may not be a John Holmes, but remember, It's not the size of the tide, it's the motion of the ocean. I did some investigation of your job record with the railroad. They gave me everything I wanted to know. But the one thing I aquired was your official company photograph. I will publish it here for the first time.

Itsy bitsy! Shame on you!

Best Regard's,

Bonz

JerrBear · Post by **JerrBear** » Sun Aug 18, 2002 5:54 am

Mr. Bonzo,

Why, you no-good scallywag!
That's the picture on my stUPid R.R. ID card! I ought to sue you for a trillion buck dollars for unauthorized publication!

The Falcon · Post by **The Falcon** » Sun Aug 18, 2002 9:14 am

So Jerr, how'd you get the railroad job? Affirmative Action?